


A Small Mid-Life Crisis (ft. Patton)

by driftingashes



Series: A Broken Bond Renewed [5]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Cookies, Crack, Explicit Language, Fluff, For the TSS 'verse or the Red Sky 'verse, Morality | Patton Sanders is a Sweetheart, Not Canon Compliant, Redemption, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:27:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25229059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/driftingashes/pseuds/driftingashes
Summary: Malice spluttered, trying to regain his rhythm. "I...do you have any idea how easily I could-"Patton patted him gently on the back of the hand. "Yes, honey, we know, big powerful evil scary guy. You're doing great, sweetheart. Cookie?”
Relationships: Platonic LAMP/CALM
Series: A Broken Bond Renewed [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1780021
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	A Small Mid-Life Crisis (ft. Patton)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Vinegar_and_Garlic_Salt](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vinegar_and_Garlic_Salt/gifts).



> This is crack more than anything else, really. BUT Red Sky very nearly went something along the lines of the less crack-ish part of this. Like, Mal was going to realize he was being a punk (word borrowed from V, creds) and then Avdima was going to split away from him and poof everyone is happy again!! And Mal would've had friends again!!
> 
> This is funnier if you read the main story but it works by itself. It just isn't nearly as good.
> 
> ~Ash

“Thomas is calling me,” Logan grumbled, holding up a finger. “Can we pause this for a moment, please?”

Malice stopped dead to stare at Logan in confusion. “But...I was...”

”You were in the middle of your evil monologue, yes, terribly sorry about that, I just need a moment to talk to our Host.” With that, Logan sunk out, leaving a bewildered Malice and a giggling Virgil.

"Oh _bitch_ , you should see the _look on your fucking face_ , he just _completely_... holy shit I don't know if that was even intentional, I-"

Virgil cackled, covering his mouth as he snorted with the force of his laughter. "Oh my god. Oh my god, is there a blooper reel for this story?"

"QUIT! BREAKING! THE DAMN! WALL!" Dee screeched from the other room, which of course just made Virgil laugh harder.

"Sorry, Double Dee!"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!!!"

Malice spluttered, trying to regain his rhythm. "I...do you have any idea how easily I could-"

Patton patted him gently on the back of the hand. "Yes, honey, we know, big powerful evil scary guy. You're doing great, sweetheart. Cookies?" he asked, offering him a plateful.

Malice tried one more time to get himself back on track, but after a moment of sputtering, he sighed and folded his crimson wings, plopping down on the couch. Slowly, like he thought he might startle Morslity i to retracting thw cookie offer, he accepted a handful of cookies from the moral Side, staring at them as if he didn't quite understand how they had gotten there.

Logan rose back up in the Mindscape a moment after. "Thomas is fine, resume business as usual. As I was saying before we were interrupted, I will absolutely not allow you to jepordize-Patton? Why are you giving him cookies? And...why is he sitting on our couch?" Logan asked, eyeing the other Side distrustfully, shock clear on his face.

Patton grinned. "We accidentally may have, uhm, started a small mid life crisis, I think? Maybe?"

Malice set his cookies aside and put his head in his hands. "I've been terrible to you all," he mumbled. "You've done nothing wrong and you even tried to make friends with me when it was first revealed that I was not the Side you thought I was. What have I done to you all?"

Patton nodded sagely. "Definitely a mid life crisis."

"Do you...think I can still...."

He didn't even need to finish before Patton was nodding. "You're not bad. Just misguided and operating off assumptions," he said. "You can still be redeemed."

"But...but Roman," Mal choked weakly.

"Roman actually reformed a couple hours ago, he's asleep in his room," Demetrius commented, stepping into the room with a swish of his capelet.

"So he'll be okay?" Remus asked. "I could feel he wasn't completely gone, but...I was still worried."

"He should be out by breakfast tomorrow," Patton said. "No worries. Although someone might want to be with him to ight. Remus?"

"Way ahead of you," the Side replied, already halfway up the stairs.

Patton clapped his hands.

"Right. That's all settled, then. Good! Anyone want to watch cartoons with me?"

**Author's Note:**

> Obvs none of this is in the canon timeline of Red Sky, but V, you can rest assured that Mal gets a happy ending here.
> 
> Oh and I named Malice/Anger because honestly him posing as Avdima was never going to be a long time thing and he needed a name anyways.
> 
> ~Ash


End file.
